Every month, EVERY MONTH, without fail, when I get my period I am stupidly, crazily, insanely horny.
Please tell me I’m not the only one?
It doesn’t matter how bad my cramps are, or how bloated and unattractive I’m feeling, I still feel horny.
I don’t understand the biology of it. You’re not fertile when you’re on your period so it’s not like the sex would get you pregnant, but still you want sex.
But Dave won’t entertain the idea. He’s never given in to my pleading desperation in over 10 years. His answer is to go up my bum.
No. No. No.
Last night was the worst ever. Putting aside the fact we were at a 90s theme fancy dress house party and Dave was wearing a dress (in fact, 70% of the men there were dressed as women haha), I was feeling sexy and attractive dressed as Britney Spears. Dave was telling his mates how attractive he found me too. So much so that he had to stop thinking about it because having a hard on in a dress isn’t a good combination 😂
But this wasn’t enough for him to give in.
We walked the 20 minute journey home (yes, dressed as we were, me carrying my heels) and it felt like I was back at uni 12 years ago walking back with a conquest. Except this was my husband and there would be no awkward exchange in the morning (or middle of the night flit). A car tooted is as it drove by. I wanted to shout “WE’RE NOT DIRTY STOP OUTS – WE’RE MARRIED!”
Our mate’s parting words to us as we left the party was to give me a good pounding. He even texted to find out if we were home and getting on with it yet lol. But still, I was up for it, but Dave just couldn’t.
It made for me to have some insanely horny dreams where I did at least get laid in them. But then I woke up horny. Disgustingly hungover, but really fucking horny. I begged. I pleaded. I suggested we do it in the shower.
He happily had a blow job though. And when I was laid on the bed after and he was looking at me I was thinking “yes! He’s thinking about it! He’s going to give in!”
I’ve done period sex once, at the tail end. I was at uni and I didn’t tell the guy til afterwards, but he wasn’t bothered. Ironically I was dressed up that night too. I think it was Fame night.
But my husband has his preferences.
That doesn’t mean I won’t spend the rest of our married lives trying to convince him to come around to my way of thinking.
Now if Mother Nature could give me a hand with that, that would be great.