Ovaries, this is Houston. You are cleared for take off.

I saw my reflexologist for (hopefully) the final time today. Remember, this lady gets more people pregnant than the Sunderland Shagger (Google him. No, actually don’t, you’ll be sick in your mouth.)

When I last saw her 2 weeks ago she predicted that I would probably get my period. Unfortunately, she was right. But I wasn’t completed surprised. My cycle wasn’t the best last month – if you remember, my right ovary interfered with the left one at ovulation, and when she saw me at 3DPO she said she felt a lot of gunk in my right Fallopian tube. Via a nerve in my right foot. Bizarre.

But today, she was very happy with what she felt. My left foot behaved as it should for this part of my cycle, and my right side is preparing for ovulation – as it should be, as it is my right ovary’s ‘turn’ to ovulate this month. I was also really pleased to hear that both of my fallopian tubes are clear, my pituary gland feels normal, and my hormones seem balanced and in sync again. It is all systems go.

After 10 years on the pill, and two years off it, I finally feel like my body has figured this shit out. Hormonally, that is.

So AF has fucked off, Dave is horny, and I’m feeling hopeful and positive.

Now right ovary, if I can politely ask you to GET. THE. FUCK. ON. WITH. IT.


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