Grapefruit Juice. You twat bastard.

The past cycle was an absolute shit one.

And I 100% blame the grapefruit juice.

Remember? Last cycle I introduced grapefruit juice to enhance my EWCM? When I didn’t even have a problem with producing my own in the first place? 

Well, I WILL NOT be drinking that shite again.

The first cycle that we start trying again after a 2 month NTNA break is NOT a good time to introduce something new. My ovulation ended up being much later than normal, there was no obvious thermal shift at ovulation, my post-O temps weren’t as high as normal, my LP was shorter by 1-2 days (depending on when ovulation actually was) and therefore my cycle was longer, at 35 days when the previous 3 cycles were 30 days and the 3 before that were 31-32 days. So now my bastard cycle average is longer.

FUCK YOU GRAPEFRUIT JUICE. FUCK YOU.

Of course, it might not have been the grapefruit juice that did this to me. It could have simply been one of those random ‘off’ cycles that women can get every now and then. But considering there was nothing else out of the ordinary last cycle, and if anything I was even more relaxed than normal because it was Christmas and I had a 2 week break from school, it seems too much of a coincidence.

So as you can work out, we didn’t get pregnant last cycle. I have grieved for the passing of one year TTC. I have accepted that the September baby plan hasn’t worked out. I had a little cry on Friday night in the sanitary aisle in Tesco.

From now on, it is back to basics and with a new game plan. And it doesn’t involve sodding grapefruit juice (sorry, I’m still not quite over it yet).

BTB #1 Drink more water. I don’t have a problem with keeping hydrated and I like water but I’m making a conscious effort to drink more. I’ve bought one of those fruit infusion water bottles and I’ve experimented this past week with putting different fruits inside (apple, orange, lemon, lime) and it’s definitely making me drink more because it’s not boring. Hopefully it will pay off in 2-3 weeks’ time when my fertile period hits.

BTB #2 Take my prenatal every day without fail. I’ve been doing this for a year now but some cycles I’ve been a bit slack. It’s a ball ache because they’re expensive, but they’re important.

BTB #3 Use the preseed like last month. If nothing else, it was fun!

BTB #4 Exercise at least 3 times a week. No more excuses with feeing tired. And teaching long days really does tire me out. But I have to build it into my routine somehow. I’ve done a DVD 3 times since last Monday and yesterday was the first time I went through it without stopping so my fitness is improving already!

BTB #5 This is the biggy. Lose weight. I joined Slimming World this week. Now, had I written this blog on Thursday or Friday night after my first weigh in and starting my period it would have been full of negative language and self-loathing. But I’ve got over it now. I’m doing something about the 5 month pregnant belly I’ve got, when I’m not even fucking pregnant. I won’t share what I weigh or how much I’ve got to lose or what my target weight is because my husband, friends, neighbours and a colleague read this blog and I want to keep those details private. But I will share each week what I lose (hopefully!) and having you all on that journey will keep me motivated. 

I really think the weight around my middle is the problem, and losing it will be the key to us getting pregnant. I’ve gone from being an hourglass shape to an apple. I was a size 10 (UK) when I first started dating Dave 10 years ago. And I swear this past year of TTC has made be gain a shit load of weight. Simply because each failed cycle led me to comforting myself with bread, crisps, chocolate and takeaways. Then I would justify it by saying, well I’ll be pregnant soon and fat anyway so it doesn’t matter. Then I wouldn’t get pregnant but several pounds heavier anyway, and the cycle would continue.

So I’m breaking that cycle as of now. I’m following the Slimming World plan. I’m filling up on free food and monitoring my syns. I feel inspired and motivated.

And Dave is being a great support too. He’s NEVER commented on my weight, always told me how gorgeous and sexy I am, and grabs my hips and slaps my bum at least a dozen times a day. But whilst his unwavering support over the past 10 years has kept my self-confidence and self-esteem high, I think that has been part of the problem. Because I know he loves me no matter what and finds me attractive whatever size I am, I got comfortable and lazy. I got the married middle spread. His compliments were hiding the reality.

Dave lost around 8st over about a year since Christmas 2014. I never really saw what size he was before because I always found him attractive and sexy. But since the beginning of last year when he got to about 11-12 stone I found him MASSIVELY attractive and I can’t believe he used to be as big as he was, because I never saw him as big in the first place. He’s maintained it ever since, he has an altheltic figure for his 6ft 2in height and he has lean muscles too. And considering the staggering amount he lost, just from eating better and taking up running, weightlifting and cycling, he has no loose skin either. He basically has the body of a footballer, but maybe not as smooth, tanned or muscular! I love him to pieces and I’m immensely proud of him, and 2017 is the year I make him proud of me.

But he still has his dickhead moments too…

(Yesterday, when I was on my period)

Him: Cheeky blowjob tonight?

Me: Um, no! What’s in it for me?

Him: Well the semen is syn free…

Prick.


2 thoughts on “Grapefruit Juice. You twat bastard.

  1. These are GREAT goals! I’ll be cheering you on from the sidelines.
    I need to drink more water too, but I find it difficult around O time. How am I supposed to stay hydrated enough for EWCM while not drinking anything to get accurate OPK results? Aaargh!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Slimming world is fantastic! The consultant was really supportive with our situation too. I tried grapefruit juice but it was to nasty ergg literally made me about vomit. Plus it’s actually quite expensive when your going through litres of the stuff a month x

    Liked by 1 person

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