The other night when Dave and I were getting into bed, I patted the mattress beside me and invited him to “come snuggle” as in “come here and snuggle me”.
What he actually heard was “cum snuggle”. He thought I was using a euphemism for sex.
The more we thought about it, the more it made sense. Having sex is basically a cum snuggle.
And then yesterday, we did a 3 mile trek with to my parents’ house in the next village. When we got back I was ACHING all over. Probably because the only exercise I do these days is in the bedroom (although I am constantly on the move at work).
I wasn’t prepared to let my aching body interfere with our session last night though, especially as the previous 2 days were written off because of my stomach bug. I’m in my fertile window so every session counts at the moment.
What I wasn’t prepared for though, was the cramp. And that is a right bugger for fucking up a decent sex session.
I had been in position on all fours for just a little bit too long, and I felt my thighs starting to burn. It was the creeping sense of fire where I thought “shit, if Dave doesn’t finish in the next 2 minutes I’m going to massively piss him off by suddenly removing myself from his penis and screaming my way down the stairs, naked, and crying.”
Not a sexy look.
Fortunately I felt Dave quicken the pace and I took one for the team, bit down on the pillow, and powered my way through the final 30 seconds.
Dave thought I was screaming in ecstasy. I was actually screaming in pain.
But whatever gets the job done.